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Mar 27, 2020. 22 comments

The Trump Administration Just Canceled an Order for 80,000 Ventilators to Haggle Over the Price

The Trump Administration Just Canceled an Order for 80,000 Ventilators to Haggle Over the Price

If there is a woman in your neighborhood who has ventilators, you might as well go on and get you one to bring to the hospital in case of an emergency because if you are waiting for the president of the United States or his bumbling band of yes-men disguised as an administration to save you, then God bless you.

On Thursday, it was reported that the United States officially has the highest...

22 Comments

Mar 19, 2020. 2 comments

When Tucker Carlson Started Taking Coronavirus Seriously, Guess Who Followed Suit?

When Tucker Carlson Started Taking Coronavirus Seriously, Guess Who Followed Suit?

The first case of coronavirus was diagnosed in the U.S. on January 21, but the president knew that this was definitely something to keep an eye on at the end of December 2019. That’s when Wuhan, China, the reported epicenter of the coronavirus outbreak, had been investigating an “outbreak of respiratory illness in the central city of Wuhan.”

He didn’t care in January. Well he cared a bit.

Six...

2 Comments

Mar 07, 2020. 7 comments

Trump Claims the U.S. Shouldn’t Be Worried About the Coronavirus, So Why Was He Scared to Visit the CDC?

Trump Claims the U.S. Shouldn’t Be Worried About the Coronavirus, So Why Was He Scared to Visit the CDC?

President Contaminated HawSpit—also known as the Human Racism Virus—keeps telling America that we’ve got nothing to fear when it comes to the coronavirus. In fact, he basically said that if blacks have their peppermints and ginger ale, they should be good. He also recommended that if white people use whatever they use to keep illness at bay handy (I believe it’s Milk of Magnesia or Febreeze),...

7 Comments

Feb 27, 2020. 21 comments

Move Over MAGA Hats, Trump Campaign’s Black Outreach Includes ‘Woke’ T-shirts

Move Over MAGA Hats, Trump Campaign’s Black Outreach Includes ‘Woke’ T-shirts

For some reason—maybe this has to do with white Midwestern farmers who don’t realize that Trump doesn’t care about them and yet they still support him—Trump believes that there is a way to pull the black vote. Since his campaign is either relentless, grossly underestimating the political education of black folks, or stupid (something tells me it’s all three), Trump’s reelection campaign—which...

21 Comments

Feb 21, 2020. 16 comments

Trump’s Tweets Worked: Roger Stone Sentenced to 40 Months in Prison

Trump’s Tweets Worked: Roger Stone Sentenced to 40 Months in Prison

Roger Stone, the longtime ally of President Trump who unironically dresses like a 1920 gangster and a traveling magician had a child, was sentenced to just 3 years and 4 months in prison Thursday, for crimes involving the special counsel’s investigation into Russia’s remix of the 2016 presidential campaign.

Stone’s sentence will also include 2 years probation and is drastically lighter than...

16 Comments

Feb 14, 2020. 20 comments

Now Former White House Chief of Staff John Kelly Wants to Tell His Truth. GTFOH

Now Former White House Chief of Staff John Kelly Wants to Tell His Truth. GTFOH

Former White House Chief of Staff John Kelly is now telling his truth, which could mean a few things:

He’s gotten a grim medical diagnosis and wants to make right with the Lord.He’s got a book to promote.He really hates Trump now and wants to stick it to him.

Whatever the reason, Kelly is now ready to tell his truth or the truth, or the truth he didn’t tell when he was inside the White House.

20 Comments

Feb 07, 2020. 22 comments

Insufferable Trump Holds Up Newspaper With ‘Acquitted’ Headline and Blasts Dems During National Prayer Breakfast

Insufferable Trump Holds Up Newspaper With ‘Acquitted’ Headline and Blasts Dems During National Prayer Breakfast

We all knew that the impeachment acquittal of President Donald Trump was going to make him even more impossible to tolerate, and in his first public appearance since convincing Republicans that they better stay the course, Trump didn’t disappoint.

On Thursday at, of all places, the National Prayer Breakfast, Trump walked onto the stage like a professional wrestler, holding up “copies of USA...

22 Comments

Feb 06, 2020. 18 comments

Trump Refused to Shake Nancy Pelosi’s Hand and Other Petty Moments From the State of the Union

Trump Refused to Shake Nancy Pelosi’s Hand and Other Petty Moments From the State of the Union

The State of the Union under the Trump administration has become a congressional version of the mythical Hater’s Ball. Everyone goes but everyone hates everybody. It’s basically a sorority step show without the stepping. There is more shade being thrown here than all of the Housewives series combined.

Even the guests, invited by members of Congress, are political passive-aggressive avatars...

18 Comments

Feb 01, 2020. 13 comments

Trump Asked John Bolton to Help Pressure Ukraine 2 Months Before the July 25 Call

Trump Asked John Bolton to Help Pressure Ukraine 2 Months Before the July 25 Call

While all of us have heard about the July 25 phone call that Donald Trump had with Ukrainian President Seymour Shutupsky (like you know his name and how to spell it), according to former National Security Advisor John Bolton’s unpublished manuscript, nearly two months before that call, Trump wanted Bolton to help pressure Ukraine and reportedly said all of this in front of his folks.

The New...

13 Comments

Jan 31, 2020. 13 comments

President Trump’s Border Wall Refuses Breathalyzer, Field Sobriety Test After Being Caught Falling Down

President Trump’s Border Wall Refuses Breathalyzer, Field Sobriety Test After Being Caught Falling Down

Question: What do Trump’s bullshit border wall and the London Bridge have in common?

Answer: Both of them shits stay falling down.

On Wednesday, images of Trump’s impenetrable border wall, which was supposed to be made of some the toughest rhino skins and strongest elephant tusks, began popping up on Al Gore’s internet. The wall, which was supposed to be so strong and sturdy that only a...

13 Comments

Jan 24, 2020. 16 comments

Trump Will Be the First President to Attend an Anti-Abortion Event. 53 Percent of White Women Wept

Trump Will Be the First President to Attend an Anti-Abortion Event. 53 Percent of White Women Wept

President Trump has been clear since day one that he will not be the president of all Americans. In fact, he’s been pretty clear since the beginning that he only planned to represent white supremacist men. If you think that a person like this would have had a hard time being elected, you’d be forgetting two things: Russia and white women.

Surely Russia aided Trump in stealing the election, but...

16 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Jan 16, 2020. 12 comments

Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s 7-Member Impeachment Hit Squad Includes Hakeem Jeffries and Val Demings

Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s 7-Member Impeachment Hit Squad Includes Hakeem Jeffries and Val Demings

On Wednesday, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi announced the seven House members who will prosecute President Trump’s Senate impeachment trial, and while the usual names are there (we see you, Judiciary Committee Chairman Jerrold Nadler (D-N.Y.) and Intelligence Committee Chairman Rep. Adam B. Schiff (D-Calif.)), we also see black members Democratic Caucus Chairman Hakeem Jeffries (D-N.Y.) and Rep....

12 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Jan 08, 2020. 8 comments

Trump Spent Crazy Money on an Ad to Run During Jay-Z’s Super Bowl

Trump Spent Crazy Money on an Ad to Run During Jay-Z’s Super Bowl

If the whiteballing of former quarterback Colin Kaepernick isn’t enough to boycott the NFL, how about Beyoncé’s husband crossing the picket lines to bring us a halftime show starring Jennifer Lopez and Shakira? The NFL is so racist and ridiculous that ESPN talking forehead Stephen A. Smith actually came back to his roots, arguing that black men are being overlooked for coaching positions.

8 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 13, 2019. 8 comments

2 Articles of Impeachment Approved Against Trump as the Mad King Loses His Mind on Twitter

2 Articles of Impeachment Approved Against Trump as the Mad King Loses His Mind on Twitter

In a move we all saw coming but it still took forever, the House Judiciary Committee approved two articles of impeachment against President Quid Pro Hoe. After a marathon arguing session Thursday night that looked a lot like arguments in my house, the Judiciary Committee voted along party lines to impeach the president, making him the fourth president to face impeachment and the first...

8 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 12, 2019. 15 comments

Former FBI Lawyer Is Suing FBI, the Justice Department, and Trump Still Can’t Keep Her Name Out of His Mouth

Former FBI Lawyer Is Suing FBI, the Justice Department, and Trump Still Can’t Keep Her Name Out of His Mouth

Former FBI lawyer, Lisa Page, whose “fuck the fat orange guy running for president” text messages with another FBI employee were leaked to the media, is suing the Justice Department and the FBI for being messy AF.

From CBS News:

Her attorneys argue in the suit that the revelation of her text messages violates the Privacy Act, which bars “disclosing a covered record ‘about’ an individual unless...

15 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 12, 2019. 9 comments

First Rocky, Now Thanos: We Are Being Governed by Evil Richie Rich

First Rocky, Now Thanos: We Are Being Governed by Evil Richie Rich

For those that don’t know, or aren’t old enough to remember, Richie Rich was a little white kid whose parents were so rich that by default he became the richest kid in America. Sadly, the president of the United States, in his stunted developmental growth is basically the evil version of the 1953 character who was so rich that his middle name was simply a dollar sign. No word on whether Ty...

9 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 10, 2019. 8 comments

Trump's Jenga Tower Set to Fall as Dems Unveil 2 Articles of Impeachment

Trump's Jenga Tower Set to Fall as Dems Unveil 2 Articles of Impeachment

And so it begins.

The slippery slope leading the president into a fiery pit of embarrassment starts today after House Democrats unveiled two articles of impeachment against President Trump.

According to the Washington Post, the articles of impeachment alleged that Trump “abused the power of his office and obstructed Congress in its investigation of his conduct regarding Ukraine.”

“We must be...

8 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 02, 2019. 6 comments

President Face-Skin Doesn’t Match His Neck-Skin Calls Impeachment Hearings a ‘Big Time Hoax’

President Face-Skin Doesn’t Match His Neck-Skin Calls Impeachment Hearings a ‘Big Time Hoax’

Stop me if you’ve heard this before.

Seriously, stop me.

Why aren’t you stopping me?

The president got in front of cameras with his face all orange-y and his neck all white before leaving to go to London to argue some NATO shit that he doesn’t understand and told the cameras that the impeachment hearing is all a big hoax.

And because the president wasn’t done, he then got on Air Force...

6 Comments

Jay Connor Jay Connor Oct 28, 2019. 18 comments

Donald Trump Makes Rare Public Appearance at World Series, Gets Hammered With ‘Lock Him Up,’ ‘Impeach Him’ Chants for His Trouble

Donald Trump Makes Rare Public Appearance at World Series, Gets Hammered With ‘Lock Him Up,’ ‘Impeach Him’ Chants for His Trouble

Outside of campaign rallies filled to the brim with his fanatic worshippers or colleges packed with indoctrinated MAGAts, Donald Trump doesn’t really do public appearances.

‘What the Hell ...’?: Trump Touts Himself as the Best to Ever Do It for Black America Before an Audience...

Donald Trump kicked off a three-day criminal-justice forum at South Carolina’s Benedict College on…

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18 Comments

Jay Connor Jay Connor Oct 22, 2019. 10 comments

Trump Foolishly Compares Impeachment Inquiry to a Lynching: ‘Republicans Must Remember What They Are Witnessing Here’

Trump Foolishly Compares Impeachment Inquiry to a Lynching: ‘Republicans Must Remember What They Are Witnessing Here’

Since the conclusion of the Civil War, lynching has been one of the country’s most prominent manifestations of racialized violence. These public displays of terrorism instilled fear in black communities and served as cruel reminders of our “place” in society. And so with all the emotions the mere mention of such a heinous act evokes, leave it to Donald Trump to compare his plight to that of...

10 Comments